Numb
by LOJSS
Summary: Elena desperately wants to feel something, anything, after her parents death and take desperate measures to find her long lost emotions. Rated T for violence!


_This is a cross-over between The Vampire Diaries and True Blood where Elena and Eggs will be in center. To avoid confusion, Eggs won't be mentioned by name, he's referred to as "the man". _**It's**** a one-shot and will most likely not be continued. This story is AU and Elena is as out of character as she could possibly be.**

_Disclaimer: I do not own The Vampire Diaries or True Blood._

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><p><strong>Numb<strong>

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><p><em>I'm numb<br>I can't feel my arms  
>I can't feel my legs<br>I can't feel my body  
>I can't feel my head<em>

_I can't come around_  
><em>Don't know what to feel<em>  
><em>I'm nailed to the ground<em>  
><em>I'm too wounded to heal<em>  
><em>(Alice in Videoland - Numb)<em>

Elena had felt numb ever since her parents died a few months ago. She had gone from being the happiest girl on Earth, to the most depressing girl on Earth. She had stopped living her life, cause it seemed as if she didn't have anything to life for anymore.

Of course, that wasn't true. She had her best friends, Meredith, Bonnie and Caroline. She had her boyfriend, Damon. She had her best friend, Stefan. And she had her brother, Jeremy. She was happy to have them in her life, and they were probably the only reason why she was still alive. If it weren't for them, she would have killed herself the same day she heard the news about her parents.

But she was desperately trying to find ways to _feel _again. She was tired of not feeling anything but empty, hollow and cold as a rock. She was constantly trying to find any kind of thrilling, exciting ways to rock her world and make it spin upside down; but every time she tried, she failed. And she was sick of it.

That was why she had run away from the town she knew so well, Mystic Fall, and left everyone she loved behind. That was why she was right in this moment on her way to Bon Temps, Louisiana. She had heard of a bar near Bon Temps, which apparantly was called "Fangtasia". Elena knew she was acting disrespectful to Damon, consider they were in a relationship and she was acting like a little school girl, trying to live the world to the fullest and break the rules. And by going to another vampire bar, far away from home, was probably one of the most stupid things she could do. It was odd to see the lenghts of how far one person could go to, to find any kind of emotion again.

She was slowly approaching the bar and was a little surprised as to how it looked. It most certainly didn't look like a vampire-bar. Elena went to the door and was met by an drop-dead gorgeous woman. Her blonde hair hung around her face like a shell, her eyes were burning with tension as she studied Elena up and down a few times.

"Can I help you with something?" the woman asked, obviously annoyed.

"Well, you could start by letting me in." Elena answered, just as annoyed as the woman before her. She had not come here to play any games or get rejected by some woman who clearly were living too high above the ground.

The womans eyes snapped up and locked with Elena's, an even bigger fire were burning in them as she stared in Elena's eyes, obviously trying to burn holes in them. She snorted, and then suddenly laughed. Elena frowned, wondering what her problem was.

"Touché. Well, if you must, then _please, _come in." Sarcasm dripped from her voice, "But I warn you, we bite."

"I'm well aware of that." Elena muttered as she slipped past the woman and walked into the club. The sound of a high pitch laughter echoed in Elena's ears until it faded and was shouted down by the music inside. The bar was dark, decorated in black and red, and there were women standing on tables, dancing like whores. One minute, they were dancing in human speed and the other they were dancing in vampire speed. _How classy, _Elena thought as she went over to the bar. She would waste no time being sober here, at least until she found who she was looking for.

She had heard about a guy who would do anything you wanted for the right price. And Elena had thought about this, not once, but twice before deciding she was actually doing it. It had been a living hell trying to keep this from Damon, but she had managed. And when he had left her earlier, she had fled town.

And now, here she was. She had gotten a description of the man, he was supposed to be black, tall, have dark eyes and really, really short hair. The person she had gotten the information from said he shouldn't be hard to track down..

A few hours passed and Elena was getting a little tipsy from all the drinks she had consumed when she finally saw the man she was looking for. He didn't look like that kind of man who did anything he was asked, even if it was for a price. But Elena didn't come here to judge people from their looks, so she pushed her thoughts away and walked over to him and grabbed his elbow.

"What the hell?"

"I have heard you exchange favours for the right kind of price." Elena whispered as she eyed him with determined eyes.

"That's right." He said, "What can I help you with?"

"Can we possibly take this somewhere more.. private?"

"Yes, of course."

The man got himself out of Elena's hold and grabbed her by the wrist to lead her out of the club again. He turned left outside and walked a few metres before turning left again, causing them to end up in the alley behind the club. It was dark, besides from a little street light covering the corner far back in the alley.

"What can I help you with?" He repeated, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I want you to make me feel." Elena said, "Anything."

"Mh-hm, I see." He nodded, "What kind of favour were you thinking about?"

Elena turned her gaze down at the street, "I want you to hit me."

"Excuse me?"

"I want you to hit me," Elena repeated. She had litteraly tried everything she could manage to try by herself, even hitting herself. But she wasn't strong enough, her hitting didn't made an impact on her. She wasn't reacting to it, no respond at all.

"There are a few things you need to know before we continute this affair." The man said, "First; I want the money in advance. Cash only. Second; you can not, under any circumstances, tell anybody what I have done for - or to - you. And third, I don't intend to have regular costumers. These, favours as you call them, is not something I offer very often. They are rarely given."

"Of course," Elena nodded, "I understand."

"Where do you want to be hit?" The man asked, shrugging. "And what do you want me to hit you with?"

"Right here." Elena drew away her hair from her face and covered her cheek with her palm, showing the man exactly where to hit. She knew she would be bruised, but there was always make-up, or she could just tell everyone she fell down the stairs or something. "With you fist."

"Okay then. Let's get to business, it will cost you 200$."

Elena handed the money over and stood up straight, she didn't dare to look the man in the eyes. He must probably think she is crazy for wanting to be hit. What kind of woman wants to be hit by a man, willingly for that matter. It was pretty insane. But she was desperate, and she would do anything she possibly could to feel, anything again. It may be pain, but that would be enough. As long as she was feeling again, it would be enough.

"Do you want to be hit once, or repeatedly?"

"That depends; if you hit hard enough, it will be enough with once."

Elena could sense his eyes on her and nodded, as if giving him permission to begin his favour. She closed her eyes, waiting for his fist to collide with her cheek. If anyone had said she would be standing her, in a alley with an un-known man, waiting to be hit, she would have laughed at them and simply believed they were crazy.

It's almost fascinating how fast things can change, how easy your whole world can be turned upside down and become a living hell. Elena thought back to the day when her parents died, their car had flipped off Wickery Bridge, into the water. Her father had lost focus on the road for a few seconds and that was it; they were down in the water. That was the end for them, and Elena couldn't stop asking herself why she had survived when her parents didn't.

She sighed, snapped out of her thoughts when she heard the man before her take a few deep breaths, probably preparing him for what to come. She was praying, to whatever God there might be, that she would feel again after this. If it was painful enough, maybe she would snap back on the right track again and become, maybe not fully, the same girl she was a few months ago. She needed to be, not only for herself, but for the people she loved.

As a final cue, the man cleared his throat disturbingly before pulling back his fist, curved it into a ball and then with full force pushed it through the air until it collided with Elena's face. Her eyes were still closed, and she could feel a gust of wind right before she felt the connection between her skin and his fist. Her body rotated so she was facing the end of the alley as she fell down to her knees.

Seconds passed, she felt nothing. Absolutely nothing. Tears burned behind her eyelids as she stood up and faced the man once again.

"Do it again." Elena breathed, "And do it harder."

The man drew back his fist again as Elena closed her eyes, once again afraid to meet his eyes. Her breathing had increased, she almost choked on her breathe as his fist once again collided with her cheek and turned her the other way around. This time she fell so she was half lying on the ground; she still felt nothing.

Had her parents death turned her into a state of never feeling anything again? Or was this man simply not trying hard enough? Didn't he use all his strength, like she had asked him to? _Why wasn't she feeling anything? She should be feeling pain!_

For the third time, Elena stood up and faced the man. She was becoming angry, both at herself and this man. She yelled at him to hit her again, she was yelling things to build up an anger inside of him, which he could act out on her. And it seemed as it worked, for a split second as she looked in the man's eyes, it looked like he saw red, and just as she closed her eyes again, she felt his fist collide _once again _with her cheek. And this time, as she fell down towards the ground, the pain hit her hard. And fast.

Elena heard the deep in take of breath the man drew and she heard herself sob hysterically. Her chest rose heavily up and down as she tried to control herself. The pain struck her like lightning, it went through her whole body, all the way from her toes up to the top of her head. It all came back to her, all the pain and guilt she was feeling since her parents died.

It had worked. She was feeling.

The man mumbled something before he walked back the way they had earlier walked together and disappeared behind the corner of the wall. Elena didn't care enough to thank him for what he had done, she laid still on the ground, sobbing and laughing at the same time. She must have looked crazy. But she didn't care. She was feeling. For the first time in months, she was feeling!

The Gods must have responded to her prayers. That was the only solution she had; they must have responded.

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><p><em>Thank you for reading. I can tell you this; this is so different from what I usually writes. The idea just popped into my head and it was useless trying to get it out of there without writing this. And I hope it turned out, at least, half-okay.<em>

_I would be very grateful if you would take a minute and leave your thoughts in a review. It would truly mean alot for me and my writing in the future. Much love._


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